“Is it appropriate to have your ex-boyfriend as your friend?”
-Holly, Canada
Many people have an issue with whether or not an ex-partner
can be friends. Although many people
will disagree to being friends after a horrible break-up, how do you know if it
is appropriate to continue to friendships? “Let’s just be friends.” But what does it mean to be friends? In some ways being friends with your ex-boyfriend is harder than being friends with someone who was not. If you are willing to put your past relationship aside you can possibly have a friendship. Here is some great tips to continue to be friends with an ex.
How to stay friends after a break-up:
1. Evaluate whether this is the best course of
action. Was it a horrible break up where one or the both of you has been
infected over it? Example: if one of you has humiliated the other person in
front of your friends; then, it might not be the best of choices.
2. Allow time to heal. Have you both gotten
over the break-up? I have a friend who still tells his ex-girlfriend that he
wants to marry her. For approximately 2-3 months, but can take longer or
shorter, after the break up heal your broken heart.
3. A break up is a break-up; if not, then it is
not. This is a time to avoid having sex with each other otherwise you may
start being girlfriend and boyfriend again. My fiancée and I had flirted on
each other while we were broken up and eventually realized we were too good together
to stay broken up.
4. A partner is a partner; and an ex is an ex. Just like number three there are boundaries,
the people must appreciate the new bonds in their ex-partner’s life. Do not glare
at the new partner or state that you want to be that person.
5. Take it slow! Remember, not necessarily
will you want to be ‘friends’ all the time. Sometimes it might still sting when
you least expect it. If friendship does not work out come together, discuss it
with your ex to what should happen. Your current partner or their current
partner might also have a say in whether or not is a good idea.
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